8 hours

Today has been one of the best days for Ammon. He was awake and looking around without crying, whining, or moving uncomfortably around, for about 8 hours. Until today I think the longest he had gone being awake and not crying was one or two hours. I started putting him in his wheelchair last week, a couple times a day to be able to sit him up and help open his lungs. He would wince and cry in pain just from me picking him up. He would move his head around and cry and I would rub his head until he would settle down and fall asleep like he just couldn't handle it. I would count down the minutes until he had been there enough to cough out some junk and then lay him down. That is the extent of our "exercise". Today I held him while we were changing his bedding. I hadn't held him for a while and last time I did I slowly watched his respiratory rate decrease until medical intervention had to take over. The time before he never stopped crying. Today he sat there with me, and just looked at me with those wonderful steel eyes and long eyelashes.

I went to the temple yesterday. I had been frustrated. One morning I came in to see blood all over Ammon's mouth and lips along with dried fluid that had leaked out of his g-tube. Another day I came in to find his respiratory status had changed from the cpap back to extremely high bipap, when he had worked the whole day to ween down. I had asked the in-charge nurse to please give him a nurse that he has already had..we've had many..to take care of him through the night while I went home to get much needed rest..to then find out it didn't happen. I started overlooking all the blessings and neglecting the immense gratitude. The temple filled me with peace and love from our Savior, and reminded me of all the miracles and good that is occurring daily.

Today was a good day. There were many who continue to fast with us. Our family was together at the hospital to talk to Ammon. He's getting better. They have to push back his chemo treatments again because of his blood count status, but the good is out weighing the bad, and that's all we can ask for right now. His coloring is better..not pale as a ghost, or red from a reaction, just nice and peachy. The things we added today were ear drops, his ear was draining and probably has an ear infection, and normal formula again. It's like starting the whole week over again, except this time I am going to be grateful and Ammon is a little more stronger and rested.