I Forgot...

Today after church I was getting the kids changed and ready to head down and stay at Grandpa and Grandma’s house when we received a welcome knock on the door. Tara and her daughter, Audrey, were standing on our doorstep and with big smiles handed us a large stack of cards. Tara then handed us a necklace made of lollipops. The necklace looked familiar, and I knew the kids in Primary occasionally received it, but I just couldn’t remember exactly what the necklace represented or why a child received it. “The necklace is for Ammon’s birthday this week,” she said happily. Then it totally hit me. I had completely forgotten about Ammon’s birthday being this week. We thanked Tara and Audrey and it was all I could do to close the door before getting all emotional. How could I forget it was his birthday this week?! Summer didn’t forget, which is why she’s the Mom and I’m the Dad, I guess.

Apparently in Primary today the kids all created cards with beautiful drawings and thoughtful and faith filled messages of “I am praying for you Ammon…Happy Birthday Ammon…I Love You Ammon…Ammon, Come Home Soon…” Kids are great, and I wish you all could see how cool each of these cards are. Ammon has two excellent Primary teachers, Brother Hubbard and Brother Phippen, that always involve him, love him, and take such great care of him in class. One of his teachers wrote the following, “Ammon, you are such a special young man. Class is not the same without you. We all hope you are able to rejoin us soon.” Even though Ammon is generally not awake, we read everything to Ammon and show him all the wonderful cards people have made and brought to him. Every email, comment, note, text message, and even voicemails we say to Ammon. Just knowing the words are out there seems to help.



Here is a piece of good news (let’s focus on the good news first this time, shall we). The oncologists reviewed Ammon’s bone marrow biopsy and discovered that the blasts have been reduced to few or none. This is actually great news and a cause for celebration! The chemo is working. Because of these results, and in spite of all the other continuing issues, they decided to give him his next treatment of chemo today at 6:00 p.m. This is how it goes. When the cancer is down, you keep punching and kicking. You are merciless, ferocious, and relentless. You hold nothing back. You throw every bit of ammo at it, and hope the collateral damage is acceptable. You always hope. Ammon is a fighter! Even in his critical and weakened condition he handily won this round this week, and his evil tired adversary is sitting in the corner of the ring with a broken bloody nose, a confused and dazed look, and fearfully eyeing his previously underestimated opponent wondering if he really wants to come back for the next round, wondering if he ever should have gotten into this fight. This adversary didn’t understand who he was going up against! He didn’t know Ammon, he didn’t know Ammon’s friends and family, he didn’t understand Ammon’s heart, his spirit, and his ‘Hidden Strength.’ He didn’t know, but now he does, and now he’s scared. Let’s go for the knock out punch, and follow it up with a 100 more for good measure!

All the other issues described in yesterday’s post are still present and relatively unchanged. However, one more was added to the list. Over the past few days Ammon has continued to develop more liquid in his left lung. Essentially his right lung is doing well and doing all the work, while his left lung is struggling greatly. Ammon was put back on the bipap machine, and the doctors have increased the amount of lasix he’s receiving (lasix allows the body to remove liquids more quickly and easily, with the thought of assisting the left lung in removing the pooled liquids). They are hopeful that they won’t have to perform surgery to insert a chest tube and drain the lung that way, but it might come to that if it doesn’t improve. I can’t imagine any surgery would not create other issues. For example, for various reasons they have to now prick his finger to complete the glucose blood test and monitor his insulin intake. They prick his finger every two hours, but due to the low platelet counts caused by the chemo, they really don’t have to prick his finger two hours later because it is still bleeding from the original prick. It’s clear how difficult it is to treat Ammon right now. He needs to the chemo, but with the chemo he desperately needs the steroids, but the steroids contribute to his high glucose levels, which when his pancreas isn’t working causes significant issues with his diabetes, which is why he has so many fluids and other medications pumped into him, which is partially to blame for his left lung’s condition, all of which (his lung, his pancreatitis, and others) are still potentially leading to surgery, which surgeries will likely cause uncontrolled bleeding…unfortunately, we could go on and on. One solution triggers another problem. Everything has become a very delicate tight rope act, with tornado winds whipping and the tight rope bouncing violently, trying to make you fall.

Thank you again to everyone! We don’t mean to relay gloom. There really are so many blessings and miracles that have allowed us to make it this far. We are joyful, optimistic, and have felt the deep love of Heavenly Father. The chemo is working!!! The power and love of God is present!!! Let’s press Forward! Let’s double our faith and efforts right when the battle is becoming most critical. Today our ward completed a fast for Ammon. I had wonderful little kids and teenagers coming up to me all day and letting us know that they were praying and fasting for Ammon. We can feel the power that comes from those prayers and fasts, the results are real, and we are so grateful for them. Thank you again!